How a Man Can Help His Woman Ejaculate

Tantra teacher Janet Kira Lessin gives men advice on how to support a woman in freeing her sexual energy and reclaiming her ability to release Amrita.

Whether or not a woman ejaculates is an indicator of possible trauma or abuse and shows how a woman holds back in her life or relationships. Holding back is not wrong. A woman’s defenses have come into place in her being for a divine reason known only to her and her psyche and are there to protect her and maintain her integrity. They are to be honored.

The time, place and people and the place must be safe for her, that’s why it’s so important to create the container for this sacred event. Create that which she needs in order for it to be appropriate for her to let down her guard.

In tantra, the goal is GOALESSNESS, especially when it involves female ejaculation which is extremely personal, intense and involves a high degree of openness and vulnerability for both the giver and receiver. This sacred ritual deserves to be honored and respected and not put into the arena of a circus show. Getting a woman to ejaculate is not an indicator of a man’s sexual prowess and a woman’s ability to ejaculate is not yet another area where women can compare themselves and feel inferior to a man or even other women.

It takes a woman longer to get aroused than a man. So in order to get synchronized, in tantric sex we always give the woman at least one orgasm before intercourse. Read more