Spiritual Sex: Begin the Practice

Sex therapist Linda E. Savage follows up her post Spiritual Sex: Ecstatic Love Beyond the Physical with advice on how to begin the practice of spiritual sex.

It is true that our relationship with sexuality is complicated by everything that makes us human. We are all experts on our own experience, so in that regard, everyone who speaks for themselves is absolutely right. Since we are all influenced by culture and ours is particularly ambivalent about sex, much of our feelings about the subject get reflected in attitudes: the meaning we attach to sex. I know there are other models of sexuality and the one most prevalent in popular media is the Biological model. The attempt to reduce sex to physical and chemical components, a bit like plumbing systems, is perhaps a way to control the mystery of it all; but the mystery is what makes sex so interesting. As a colleague of mine, Dr. Leonore Tiefer said, to limit sexuality to biology makes it more like digestion than dancing. I choose dancing.

Let's start with the experience of sexual energy. You can try this exercise by yourself. It helps if you know how to do pelvic rocking. Lie down with your knees bent, feet about hip distance apart, and your low back flat on the floor (don't try this if you have back problems). As you rock your pelvis back with a slight arch, breathe in and as you tuck your pelvis, breathe out. Do this for just a few minutes and then lower your knees, straightening them to rest on the floor and continue breathing. Visualize energy moving up your spine with the in-breath and moving down the front of your body with the out breath. Read more