3 BIG Reasons Monogamy Is Just Not Natural, According to Science

Although society is used to monogamy, nature doesn't find it to be common.

There are many romantic things about monogamy. Having one person who knows you inside and out for the rest of your life is a beautiful thought. And relying on only one person makes life a lot simpler.

But how natural is monogamy?

Well, according to science: it's not — and these three reasons are to blame. Read more

5 Reasons Kissing Makes You Healthier - According to Science

Kissing is awesome for romantic bonding and just as great for your health, says Melissa Noble.

We know kissing as a social pleasantry, the appropriate ending to a date and a means of connecting with our main squeeze. The collision of lips and tongues that we often take for granted has a whole lot more bubbling under the surface than what meets the eye. Swine flu scares and mono aside, kissing actually does a body very, very good. Read more

Reclaiming Your Sex Life After Childbirth

Nina Hartley interviews Tantra teacher Jaiya about reclaiming your sex life after childbirth.

The Single Biggest Factor That Determines the Success of a Romantic Relationship

Erwan Davon reveals the single biggest factor that determines the success of a romantic relationship.

What is the single biggest factor that determines the success of a romantic relationship? We all know that most romantic relationships don't last as long as they could. Most of us have done our share of dating, and there's nothing wrong with that. In fact, this can be fun, so long as this is what we want. But what about when we want a lasting relationship? When we want that special person to become a soulmate and partner? That's a different ball game -- the kind of relationship most of us want in the end. My wife Alicia and I call it the "Eternal Date" -- a relationship that reaches higher and higher peaks of intimacy and sexual attraction. A relationship with soul that also has the sexy! Read more

Mindfulness in Everyday Life: Embracing Your Sensuality

Clinical psychologist Donna Rockwell, PsyD, lists six steps to enhancing your sex life.

A couple of years ago, I presented a paper on mindfulness in China, touring some of that country's major cities. I was reminded of being a young girl growing up in New Jersey, digging a hole in my backyard with a kitchen spoon all the way through the earth to China. That was how I imagined getting there. Though traveling on an airplane instead of by spoon, I finally did find my way there.

Interestingly, among the local people I met and spoke with, what was most discussed -- without me asking -- was the same theme I hear repeated in this country, a bemoaned lack of sex education available to young couples, who say they want to start their lives together in a more fully engaged way, built upon a strong, sustaining relationship throughout their lives. But in China, as in most countries around the world, what is reportedly missing from people's education and life skills training are the very tools that would be most helpful in figuring out how to live a more successful, meaningful and happy life. Read more

10 Tips to Increase Eroticism and Desire in Your Relationship

Kelly McDonnell Arnold gives ten tips to increase eroticism and desire in your relationship.

Never in the mood? Faking it? or just doing "it" out of obligation? If this sounds familiar, here are some tips to get your groove back.

Never in the mood? Faking it? or just doing it out of obligation? If this sounds familiar, low desire may have entered your relationship. It is completely normal for desire discrepancy to occur between partners who are engaged in a long-term relationship. Just like every other enjoyable thing in life, sex takes time and effort, but the good news is that with some practice, you can absolutely get your groove back.

Here are 10 tips to cultivate eroticism and increase desire in your sex life. Read more

5 Sex Positions to Bring You Closer to Your Partner

These five sex position secrets will bring you closer to your partner and increase the intimacy in your relationship.

Do you want to explore new sex positions to improve your love life? If so, you are not alone. Many people think that new positions will rekindle the lost spark of intimacy and set their sex life on fire. If only it were as easy as switching positions!

The truth is that acrobatic sex positions won't improve your sex life if you don't also make an effort to increase the intimacy you are willing to share with your partner. If you are emotionally detached from one another, even swinging from the chandelier won't help. But if you want to improve your sex life and deepen your intimacy, trying new sex positions can help. Read more

Are Sex and Intimacy Different Things?

The connection between sex and intimacy can be tenuous, says Jonathan Lenbuck. He explains how sex is different from intimacy.

Are sex and intimacy different things? Can you have one without the other? Or does one lead to another?

It seems that there are many conflicting opinions on the roles of sex and intimacy within a relationship (and out of one, too).

It is difficult to really get to the bottom of this problem because no two people have exactly the same ideas on sex. In a traditional framework, sex would come with long-term commitment, or marriage, which would be associated with the couple having an intimate connection with each other (and usually wishing to procreate).

However, in an increasingly promiscuous society, the connection between sex and intimacy can be a tenuous one.  Read more

How to Kick Shame out of Your Bedroom to Awaken Your Sexual Self

Want to get to the bottom of your less-than-desirable sex life? Try writing down your feelings, says psychologist and author John M. Grohol.

... A client once said to me, "I'm nervous to talk with my wife about my sexual needs, because you are the only person who knows that part of my life." This statement struck me as wildly paradoxical. How could I, a person with whom my client has a strictly professional relationship, know more about his sexual life than the woman with whom he has sex? Read more

Can an Open Relationship Work?

Can true love really include sex with other people? Here's how to find out if it might work for you.

Most people would like to have her cake and eat it too, but is that really possible within the confines of a committed relationship? Some couples think so and, as a result, appear to live quite happily with each other while still having sex with other people.

While hard-and-fast statistics about open relationships are hard to come by, some experts estimate that up to 4 percent of couples practice polyamory, allowing themselves and their partners to seek sexual experience beyond the common boundaries of marriage. When open relationships work, they're based on trust, understanding and communication. When they don't, it's often because jealousy and resentment creep in.

If you're looking for a little sexual adventure, an open relationship can be a way to have your cake (each other) and other people on the side. But can true love really include sex with other people? Here's how to find out if it might work for you. Read more

5 Steps to Opening Up Emotionally in Your Relationship

Expressing your emotions in a relationship isn't always easy, but it can be profoundly rewarding, says relationship coach Teresa Maples.

Do you find it hard to let yourself be vulnerable in a relationship? Fear of intimacy is the main reason people do not open up emotionally with another person. I define intimacy as feeling safe with another person when you expose who you are to them. Intimacy involves protecting your loved one rather than exploiting their vulnerabilities. And when I say intimacy, I don't just mean sex. There are a huge range of emotions and behaviors that enhance the intimacy, or deepening, of your relationship. Your own feelings are the key to discovering what intimacy-building behaviors will work for you. Read more

Orgasm: 400% More Satisfying with a Partner?

A 2006 study found that orgasm achieved through intercourse is 400% greater for both men and women when compared with masturbation.

A 2006 study found that the increase of prolactin is 400% greater for both men and women following orgasm achieved through intercourse, when compared with solitary masturbation.

Why is this significant? The increase of prolactin after orgasm contributes to a reduction of sexual arousal, along with feelings of relief and a greater drop in sexual tension. The researchers suggested that factors such as more excitement during intercourse might contribute to the greater amounts of prolactin after orgasm. While prolactin isn’t the only factor in sexual satisfaction, the implications are important. Read more

Swinging Won't Fix a Broken Relationship

Swinging won't fix a broken relationship, says KissinBlueKaren. A swinging relationship takes work, more work even then a monogamous one.

Swinging won’t fix a broken relationship. I have to say this again because we keep running into couples that actually think it will. I’m sorry. If you are on the outs, or just getting back together from being on the outs, this isn’t a good time. A swinging relationship takes work, more work even then a monogamous one. Read more

Talking about Sex during Sex Is Good for Sex

New research finds that comfort with sexual communication is directly linked to sexual satisfaction.

Getting comfortable with communicating about sex may translate to benefits in the bedroom — especially if the lines of communication are open during the act.

New research finds that comfort with sexual communication is directly linked to sexual satisfaction. People who are more comfortable talking about sex are also more likely to do so while having sex, the researchers found. Nonetheless, that difference doesn't fully explain why the sexually chatty are happier with their erotic lives. Read more

5 Simple Tips to Improve Your Relationship

Men's Fitness reveals five easy ways for men to improve their relationships and their sex lives with their partners.

Reinstate Date Night

Whether you’ve been together a year or a couple of decades, it’s easy to fall into a rut. Bring back the romance from when you first got together. Commit to spending one night a week as a couple, outside the house. Even if you’re just having dinner or going on a long drive, you’ll be amazed how much your relationship benefits simply from the added one-on-one communication time it brings.
Unplug Read more

The Steady Decline of Affection in America

Courtesan Bethany St. James says that more and more these days her stock-in-trade is not sex, but affection. She says that modern Americans have failed miserable when it comes to differentiating between the words sex and sensuality.

... Having been a professional paramour all my adult life, I was struck by the recent resurgence of requests for romantic interludes. I started to wonder: What has caused so many people to suddenly feel so alone and in need of an ear, a hand to hold, or casual dinner conversation? The answer is simple.

In my opinion, modern Americans have failed miserably when it comes to differentiating between the words "sex" and "sensuality." Our view of what is "sexy" has become so askew that many women and men don't even know what their own desires are anymore. With most contemporary portrayals of sexuality being outright promiscuity and tactless drunken debauchery, it's not surprising that women and men have lost sight of the joys and need for sensuality. Between this severely misguided view of human sexuality and the pressures of our everyday lives, the sex lives of most Americans have been stunted. Those involved in relationships, and even those who are battling through the "dating scene," are faced with the pressures to conform to what society is telling us sex should be. Read more

Is "Comfort Sex" the New Casual Sex?

Sex doesn't always have to be ecstatic, says Jill Di Donato. Sometimes it can just be comforting, and that's not a bad thing.

Have you ever gotten that craving for sex, but not for the usual reasons? After a particularly rotten date, a silly fight with one of my best friends, or maybe just one of those days when nothing seems to go my way, I tend to call a certain "acquaintance" who is more than happy to have me over for a few hours between the sheets. This guy isn't someone I'd date, or even consider a friend, but he does have a knack for taking me from forlorn to very content faster than any other remedy I've tried.

Here's the strange part, though: These aren't wild, amazing, did-it-on-every-surface-of-the-apartment liaisons. The sex is good, but it's not life-changing. And even stranger, that's why I like it. Every time it goes pretty much the way I expect, no more, no less. Our encounters don't rock my world -- but they do leave me full of endorphins and also that warm, safe feeling you get from simply being held. Exactly what I needed. Read more

Tap Into Tantra for an Intimacy Infusion

Looking for a way to improve your relationship? Try Tantra. Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver, founders of TantraNova, share their Tantric tips to bring you and your partner closer.

The Yin-Yang of Love
Tantra has its roots in the religions of India and has long been practiced in other Eastern countries, including China, Nepal, Tibet, Bhutan, Pakistan, and Sri Lanka. Here, we tend to associate Tantra with the sexual staying power of men (thank you, Sting!), but the practice isn’t simply about being better in bed.

The Tantra discipline uses ritual, energy and breathing in order to achieve harmony with the universe (the divine), yourself and your partner. It can help you learn about yourself and open the door to longer, more satisfying sex. And yes, men who practice Tantra are able to last longer through a combination of breathing, relaxation and muscle contraction. Read more

8 Secrets to Great Sex

A new study confirms what Tantra has always taught: that the real secrets to great sex are emotional connection between partners, communication, and focus.

Forget Viagra, sex toys or master Kama Sutra-style sexual gymnastics, the key ingredients to a great sex are all in your mind, according to recent study.

Contrary to the pop culture notion that hot looks and masterful technique are what that matter, a recent research in The Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality found that the real essentials are emotional connection between partners, communication and focus.

The study, conducted on namely married couples over the age 60, also found that the best sex comes with relationships as they become more mature, reports Fox News.

The key ingredients to rock star sex are:

1. Being present, focused and embodied
More than any other factor is the need for lovers to be completely absorbed in the moment, feeling completely merged in one another. Read more

Play the Tantra Sex Pleasure Game

For a fun and effective way to rekindle the passion and romance in your relationship, play the Tantra sex pleasure game, says Tantra teacher Crystal Dawn Morris.

At the beginning of a relationship sex is often spontaneous, intense and erotic. This phenomenon is called the 'Honeymoon phase.' It is when the 'New Relationship Energy' or NRE, makes everything exciting. Over time the NRE naturally fades, ro­mance dwindles, passion begins to wane and sex often becomes routine.

The Pleasure Game is a fun and effective way to rekindle the passion and romance in your relationship. Read more