Yoni (YO-NEE) is the Sanskrit word for the vagina. In Tantra, the vagina is a sacred part of the female body, which must be treated with care and respect. The Yoni massage is a sensuous form of intimacy that builds trust between partners and brings them closer together emotionally and spiritually.
Although the Yoni massage can be extremely stimulating, the purpose is not to bring the woman to orgasm. Rather, it is to relax both the giver and the receiver and to bring emotions to the surface. The experiences and feelings that a woman may have during the Yoni massage can be very different, ranging from anger, lust, sadness, or even indifference. Everything is possible and everything is allowed. The Yoni massage is not about focusing on a special kind of feeling or fulfilling a particular expectation. The idea is simply to observe and to experience. As you learn to master the Yoni massage, your sex life will be greatly enriched, and you will learn a great deal about feminine sexuality.
Before beginning the massage, you should gaze into each other's eyes while embracing and engaging in deep, relaxed, synchronized breathing. This is a type of Tantric foreplay in which the couple forms an emotional and spiritual bond. Both the giver and receiver should remember to keep breathing deeply, slowly, and with relaxation during the entire process. You should gently remind your woman to start breathing again if she stops or starts taking shallower breaths.
When you are both ready to begin the massage, the woman lies on her back with one pillow under her head and another under her hips to elevate her pelvis. She bends her knees and opens her legs to expose her Yoni. Sit comfortably between her legs with your legs crossed. You may wish to sit on a pillow or cushion.
Begin by massaging other parts of her body to encourage her to relax. Gently, but firmly, massage her legs, thighs, stomach, breasts and arms before venturing toward the Yoni. Next, massage the pubic bone area and then move down to the inner thigh area. Do this motion at least nine times. Then, with the right hand (the right hand is used to balance the polarity of Tantra), apply a high-quality oil or lubricant to the mound of the Yoni, pouring just enough so that it drips down the outer lips and covers the outside of the Yoni.
Gently rub the oil on the outer lips of the Yoni at least nine times. With the thumb and index finger, gently squeeze each lip of the Yoni, sliding the fingers up and down the entire length of each lip. Then, carefully repeat this process with each inner lip of the vagina varying the pressure and speed of touch according to your partner’s preferences.
Next, gently stroke the clitoris in a circular motion, clockwise and counter-clockwise. Then, squeeze her clitoris between your thumb and index finger. Next, slowly and with great care, insert your middle finger into her Yoni. Very gently explore and massage the inside of the Yoni with your finger. Varying the speed and depth of your finger, feel inside the Yoni up, down and around. With your palm pointing upward and your finger inside your partner's Yoni, bend your finger to make contact with her G-spot, known as the "sacred spot" in Tantra.
Continue massaging, trying different speeds, pressures and motions. Keep breathing and gazing into each other's eyes. She may have powerful emotions come up and may cry. Just keep breathing and being gentle. If she has an orgasm, keep her breathing, and continue massaging if she wants. More orgasms may occur, each gaining in intensity. In Tantra this is called "riding the wave." Many women can learn how to be multi-orgasmic with the Yoni massage and a patient partner.
Keep massaging until she tells you to stop. Very slowly, gently, and with respect, remove your hands. The Yoni massage creates a space for a woman to relax, and enter a state of high arousal and experience much pleasure from her Yoni. Allow her to just lie there and enjoy the afterglow of the Yoni massage while you experience the joy of being of service and witnessing a special moment.
When personal Tantra instruction is either inconvenient or too expensive, Al Link and Pala Copeland's Sexual Mastery Course and Kerry and Diane Riley's Ultimate Home Tantra Course are two excellent self-teaching courses. I highly recommend either of these courses for those who can't find a local Tantra teacher, attend a Tantra workshop, or just want to explore Tantra in the privacy of their own home.