Thursday, June 23, 2011

Orgasm Meditation

Can every woman really become orgasmic in just fifteen minutes?
"In just fifteen minutes every woman can become orgasmic," the PDF promised. It was part of a press kit for a new book about sex called Slow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasm by Nicole Daedone. That the PDF told me all kinds of other things about the book, its philosophy and practice and its author, didn't matter, all I could do was groan.

I've become weary over the years of advice writers, self-help gurus, and authors who capitalize on sex by perpetuating messages that further hinder the enjoyment of our bodies instead of helping us. You’ve seen me rail against the lie-detector techniques perpetuated by, GQ's sex-for-chores barter system and even this new craze with the 40 beads. I worry because these suggestions focus on sex in a way that makes it about everything but sex. Read more


PK said...

Being a man, I dont know if I can comment on this. However, ir you're looking at oral sex, a women can reach orgasm within 10-15 minutes, I think. At least, Ive experienced that with my wife!

Jennifer Lawless said...

Many women don't have orgasms from penetrative sex, however.

PK said...

Hi Jen, So true, why do you think that happens? Is it the mind frame of the particular woman?

Jennifer Lawless said...

No, it's usually because of insufficient clitoral or G-spot stimulation during intercourse.

PK said...

I think its also a question of direct excitement of the sex organ. In oral sex, a man directly excites woman's vagina and sensitive spots; likewise when a woman takes the man's penis in her mouth it excites it directly, so orgasm is faster , just my theory?

Jennifer Lawless said...

Shouldn't sexual intercourse also directly stimulate the sex organs?

PK said...

Hi Jen,

I,m not an expert, but I think it should, but direct sexual intercourse is often not perfect, unless the man and woman are very compatible and also experienced.

In my own experience with my wife, for many years, I used to screw her directly from front, but while I enjoyed it and had good orgasms, she rarely did.

She enjoyed it when I fingered her vagina and clitoris, I also used to give her oral sex but in a reverse position, with me bending over her vagina. That excited her, but not to the extent of an orgasm. One day, I gave her oral sex from front, and she loved it and went into repeated orgasms a few minutes later.

So now, I combine it with oral sex first, and then intercourse, which is more enjoyable for her since her vagina is so wet and soft.

I guess this delay in our realizing the joy of oral sex is because of our Asian culture, we did not have pre-marital sex experience!

However, my wife has not done oral sex on me so far, still hoping!

Thanks for your interesing discussions!